Remembering New Orleans

Forgot about this story:

My roommate Kevin and I were hanging out in New Orleans, helping to get a shop set up in riverwalk.  I don’t quite remember how we got suckered into it, but someone convinced us to spend our last $30 or so on lightstick neckalaces to resell at all the bars.

We trudged off, in search of bars with no covers, and finally found one down toward the canal street end of things…  But sadly enough, when we go in, the bar was about 20x20 and there was no one there…  two salesmen types fresh from a convention, two working girls working the salesmen, a bartender, and a band who was slated to go on in a few minutes.  Dead, dead, dead.

We were planning our exit, when the band took the stage.  And a few bars into the first set, their pyrotechnics went off.  4 people in the bar, and the band has frickin smoke pots, fountains, flash-bangs, etc.  So-so band, but light show was definitely a-list, and worth sticking around for the oddity of it all.

The hookers started dancing with the guys soon enough, and  they convinced the salesmen to buy all of our necklaces – or at least enough to pay us back and pay for beignets and coffee the next morning.

Best city in the Fuckin’ world…

Progressives

I tend to be tolerant of the social conservatives, even the silly ones.  I disagree with most of their tenants, but with a few vocal exceptions, they seem a nice enough bunch of folks.  I hesitate to judge people as backward or savage, since by some future morality, we will all be judged harshly.  We will either be judged as backward and repressive like we judge the Puritans, or perhaps as amoral and debauched as we consider the Romans.

Morality changes, and any time we project that our current morality will be the future morality we have a pretty bad track record.  Yet historically, people always assume that their current morality is the truest morality.

So I don’t mind the social conservatives, although I don’t vote for their candidates, and I wouldn’t want to subscribe to their newsletters.

Progressives on the other hand, are more fun to drink with.  At least they used to be.  Increasingly, especially as the election looms, many seem more and more likely to look for offense -- which, to me at least, is pretty tiresome.  I judge their current platform harshly, and think many of it’s ideas don’t stand up to logical scrutiny or the lessons of history. 

The current crops of progressives seem resistant to consider alternative viewpoints, and are increasingly ridged in their viewpoints.   Their politics don’t seem like philosophy to be debated, but instead dogma which must be repeated.   There seems little discussion of policy choices, only a repeating of a few select facts, an agreement that the other side is stupid and monstrous, and a lot of nodding. While many progressives consider themselves open-minded and independent, there seems little leeway or difference between their opinions and those of their peers.  They are the new grey flannel suits, conformist and unyielding with surprisingly little room for individuality.

I suppose it’s inevitable.  Historically, progressives – be they suffragettes, prohibitionists, Bolsheviks or whatever – tend to be a pretty arrogant bunch (which can be a good thing).  They are always ready to march -- occasionally to a better future, but occasionally off a cliff.  Given their track record -- maybe a 30% average of real lasting change, with an equal chance of atrocity or genocide – you’d figure progressives of any era would be a bit less strident, and maybe a bit more careful or critical of the platforms they embrace.

But here we are again, marching in yoga-panted lockstep toward uncertainty.  Let’s hope for the happy 30% this time around.

Smartguy no more?

I’m a smart guy.  9’s on my Iowas as a kid, invited to John’s Hopkin’s as a teen, Ivy league SAT’s as a highschool dropout,  Aptitude scores in the top percentiles, Member of mensa, etc.

Whupdedoo.

I play it off like I don’t much give a shit, but it’s been a source of pride.  No matter how much of a fuckup I was, I could always look at the test scores as proof positive that I might, one day, be worth a shit.(Other folks have used the scores as evidence of my wasted potential.)

So imagine my dismay, when in the latest round of testing for my poor beat up brain, I scored  (gulp) “average, to high-average IQ.”  WTF is that?  I’m a “superior to very-superior” kinda guy… At least I always have been.

So  I’m left with three possibilities:

1)      The test was wrong,  or they dumped the data because it was more than 2 standard deviations high.

2)      Although my memory is intact, my analytical abilities have decreased.

3)      I was never as smart as I suspected.

A bit of the old irony…  I am more successful than I have ever been.  Great family, most wonderful wife in the world, making good money, etc.

But, as is so common to getting older, I have a little less potential.

I am reminded that we all get to a point where life stops giving you things, and starts taking them away.

And I hear that lonesome clock ticking.

Chiari and me

Several years ago, I began to get headaches.  I went to see a Dr. Greenfield in Annapolis who ran a battery of tests, including an MRI.  The test detected a minor Chiari Malformation –about 3-4mm.  A referral to a Neurologist did some further tests, but found little nerve damage.  He figured my headaches were migraines, and I learned that they were made worse by chocolate and soy.

So that went on for a few more years.  However in the spring of 2010 I started to have more symptoms.  Tingling in my extremities got worse, headaches got more frequent, and my vision seemed to deteriorate.  But far and away, the worst syptom was an increased “fogginess.”  I seemed more often confused, and my memory started to give me problems.

I saw two more doctors, a general practitioner and a neurologist, before being referred to my current neurologist.

He ordered another round of MRI’s, and did a number of nerve tests.  It turned out I had carpel tunnel, and he blamed that for the tingling in my extremities.  Although the MRI showed that my Chiari herniation had elongated to 7-8mm, he didn’t belive that it was the root of my cognitive problems.  Instead he believed that I might suffer from sleep Apnea.

A sleep study proved him correct, and I began to use a CPAP machine to keep my airways open while I slept.  Oxygen deprivation during sleep causes brain damage (and is associated with a number of health problems), and it was hoped that with time my syptoms would reverse.

So far, as of November 2011, I have seen some improvement.  A course of physical therapy and a number of excercises have made the tingling and numbness a rare thing. The headaches have nearly disappeared – I can even tolerate some soy and chocolate!  But the cognitive problems have been more stubborn.

They seem cyclical, and I believe they have improved somewhat, but my memory issues seem beyond what I could expect at my age.

I have most recently undertaken a more extensive series of cognitive tests in order to benchmark and identify the issue.

Needless to say, I have fears over things like early onset Alzheimers (although without a family history, it is very very rare.)

I find out next Tuesday. 

Additionally, I am wondering if the CPAP is not as effective as it could be due to my mouth opening at night  (I’ve read this can be a problem) I’ve ordered a chin strap in hopes that this helps.  I’ve been using a bathrobe tie to keep my jaw shut the last few nights, and it seems to help keep my AHI numbers down. 

Anyhow, I read about the difficulties many with Chari have, and my heart goes out to them – particularly the kids.  Even on it’s worst days, my own chiari is far from debilitating.  For some folks, it means not being able to walk, work, or really function.

Strange to think how your brain drives your whole life,  that you really aren’t more than the firing of neurons and such. Lack of oxygen and/or restricted CSF fluid might undue some of my thinking, but I'm going to put some of my modest resources toward charities that work on Chiari.  If our brains are nodes in part of a larger collective mind, I'm going to put mine to work as part of the immune system.  Addled or not, I can become part of my own cure, even if it happens long after I'm gone.

How does the fable of the ant and the grasshopper end in a Democracy, when the grasshoppers have a majority?

Often disagree with F.Z.  but found the data in his OCT. 6 essay interesting:

"Perhaps the most crucial measure of our ability to compete in a global economy is our educational attainment, especially in science, math and engineering. A generation ago, America had the highest percentage of college graduates in the world. Today we’re ninth and falling. The WEF report ranks the U.S. a stunning 51st in science and math education. If a willingness to study science, math and engineering is an indication of being willing to work at hard stuff, there is no question that we are going soft. In 2004 only 6% of U.S. degrees were awarded in engineering, half the average for rich countries. In Japan it’s 20%, and in Germany it’s 16%. In 2008–09 there were more psychology majors than engineering majors in America and more fitness-studies majors than physical-sciences majors."

(from http://www.fareedzakaria.com/home/Articles/Entries/2011/10/6_The_Hard_Truth_About_Going_%E2%80%98Soft%E2%80%99.html)

Wow...  So policy fix would be to subsidize math/sci/engineering degrees, and tax Film degrees... It's reasonable, since somewhere down the road the Film majors are going to have to rely on the system for support.

So, to the woman being interviewed at the OWS who was upset about her $60,000 debt, and inability to find a job...  Maybe you shouldn't have majored in sculpture.

Email about Taylor

Beau introduced Taylor as his cousin.  In fact there was no relation, but Beau was apparently embarrassed to be hanging out with the kid across the street who was four or five years younger.  I think I was 15 or 16 when Taylor first showed up over at Beau’s, that would’ve made Taylor 11.

Taylor resurfaced a few years later, hanging out with some of the younger guys like Redlack and Bergman.  Taylor got into trouble like the rest of us.  He was more or less a fuck-up, just like the rest of us.

I think he went out with Laurie – I’m pretty sure – some months after she broke up with Redlack. I remember Dave and Barb, Taylor and Laurie, me and Dana all sort of lived at Taylor’s house the summer before I went to college when his folks left for Europe for a month.  We drank, fucked around, played a lot of poker and played badminton in the afternoons.  It was very civilized. 

Taylor and Dave got my Corvair impounded at one point.  Taylor ruptured his spleen at one point and nearly died.

He would eat his boogers in front of us, it was a hoot.

The last time I saw him, we we’re playing poker in my folk’s basement.  We had a game 4-5 times a week, lots of nightshift tow truck drivers would play while they were on call.  Taylor was driving a tow truck then.  Through freak cards Taylor, Dave and Dennis got into a high-low (think it was Big Chicago actually) game and the pot swelled to around $3,000 – Huge money for us back then.

Taylor lost out on the high hand to Dave and had to write Dennis a large IOU to cover it.   As luck would have it, Taylor lost his job the next day, and sort of disappeared.  I went off to Boston, and haven’t seen Taylor since.  Dennis still carries the IOU around in his pocket in hopes of collecting one day.

Anyhow, Den got a call from Beau last night/  It seems Taylor had become a successful food importer.  He’d taken over his Uncle’s business after a stint as a manager for KPMG, and college in Jacksonville.  Taylor was out in California working a deal, and had rented a convertible corvette.  He was driving some back road, but wasn’t wearing a seat belt and was thrown from the car.  He died instantly.  The other person in the car had several broken bones, but made it out many hours later and called for help.

Taylor apparently didn’t have kids, wasn’t married.  The article said he had his license suspended several times, and that he was quite successful in the restaurant business.  It wasn’t a very long article.

Strange Bedfellows

I’m wondering if President Clinton’s increased appearance on the national stage – and increased criticism of the Obama’s opponents– is a harbinger of Hillary being named to the 2012 ticket.

Two currencies to fix Greece?

When I was a kid, Pop and I were bringing a boat north from Puerto Rico when we lost an engine and wound up marooned in the Dominican Republic for a few weeks while we waited on parts.

This was 30 years ago, and the DR wasn’t quite so tourist friendly, people butchered goats on the sidewalk, guys walked the docks with assault rifles, and we learned a bit about the economics of bribery.

Bribes, fees for service really, were best paid in U.S. dollars.  Dominican dollars were acceptable, but you had to offer more of them – despite a 1:1 official peg.  Slips and fees at the government marina had to be paid in Dominican dollars – no worries, they’d change your greenbacks right there at 1:1.  (Guys downtown would change you at 1.2:1,  I’d imagine guys in the know did even better.)

Running with two currencies seemed a great way to get good dollars into the country, and I suspect into the right pockets.

Lots of countries run with multiple acceptable currencies, which made me wonder… why can’t Greece do the same?

Print Drachma for domestic use, use Euro for international payments, “fix’ an exchange rate, and let the robust underground Greek economy sort out it’s own exchange rates.  Internally, you’d get Drachma inflation, likely Euro deflation. The peg allows you to keep marks high, and likely exports a smidge of inflation. The strong euro within Greece boosts tourism and foreign investment.

Thoughts?

Gold!

I’ve been a true believer in the gold story for a number of years, and for the most part the results have been fantastic.

More recently, I’ve been disappointed with the performance of the miners, and as of this summer, as gold approached the top of its trading channel, I began to accumulate GLD puts.   That part has been less fantastic.

I do not believe in gold as money, at least not yet.   I’ve never purchased anything with gold, don’t know of many people that have.  While it’s true that it has a historic use as a medium of exchange, so do goats.

I have a hard time believing that my house and land is now worth 30lbs of the stuff, rather than 60lbs – especially considering the probable reserves of AU down in the creeks and in the quartz veins.

I do not believe that a year’s labor from a doctor or engineer has been cut in half, or that the value of a Monet or productive farmland has fallen so drastically relative to the metal. 

I am skeptical toward arguments for continued appreciation when I look at Gold’s appreciation relative to other assets – fiat or no, real estate isn’t appreciating, wages aren’t appreciating, washing machines aren’t appreciating, copper, oil, platinum, etc etc…  You might not want to trade that pound of gold for a used Honda, but for a new BMW you might be tempted.  And if not a BMW, then definitely a Maybach.

The certainty of gold as a refuge during deflation seems questionable as well.  I believe that the appreciation during the 30’s was more a product of nations abandoning the gold standard and massive bank failures, but I’m certainly no expert.  I think earlier historic examples speak more to gold’s portability and security than any lasting intrinsic deflationary resilience.

Maybe slow appreciation is warranted based on scarcity – say at the rate of inflation.  Which would mean over the long term you will only lose real purchasing power at whatever the capital gains (or collectible) tax rate is.  And although it’s not happening anytime soon, improved discovery and recovery methods will tend to increase supply and pressure prices.  With asteroids containing trillions of current dollars worth of the stuff, I suspect in real dollars, the very long term direction is downward. (Don’t get me started on diamonds!)

Maybe we are not yet in a bubble, or perhaps this is the rarest of all animals -- the rational bubble, but the chart and the anecdotal stuff is becoming awfully similar to most previous examples which have ended in tears.  

From my limited understanding of such things, it seems that once a bubble breaks it retreats beyond fair value, and stays there for quite a while.

At some point, even if this run is meant to continue, we will correct to the 50day (currently at $1668) or 200day ($1492) but I’m beginning to suspect that this time the game is over for a time.  Recent action looks more like the end part of a run, rather than the middle.

Course, whadda I know:  I’ve been short this month, and I have been wrong, and I am adequately bloody to show for it.  (To add insult to injury, I was on the ocean for the spike down, and missed any opportunity to be made whole.)

Hope all are well,

J.

(P.S.  Even if you’re a fan of $Gold, what about GLD?  Although I’m not as conspiratorial as some of the links and stories I’ve seen, there do seem to be some additional risks…  Anyone doing a GLD/physical pairs trade?)

Sitting In My Office Watching a Thunderstorm

It is mid August.  My wife and I are preparing for a long weekend away.  We just downloaded the school supply list for our son, the eighth time we’ve done this.

The summer work has slowed, and the list of fall work is growing.  The market is troubled and troubling.  The first crickets are appearing in the basement.  The nights are cooler, and we are making the first plans for Thanksgiving and Christmas gatherings.

I am 43 now.  The family rituals are now my rituals.  The rhythm of the year has become familiar and comforting.  Daily life has become the center of my life.

The children are not small, and their problems can no longer be soothed with a popsicle and a viewing of "The Lion King.”

The challenges are bigger, and the near term less certain.  Our parents are older, and may soon require help.  My finances are not as robust as I would like. The house is always work and imperfect.

But the daliness of life seems as it should be.  Problems or triumphs are as they should be.  I was born to fix the printer so Ry could print out his seventh grade school list.  I was born to help clean the fridge, and to short S&P index funds into the close.  I was born to walk the dogs, and to sit in my office chair watching the rain as the sun went down. I was born to be myself on this one unremarkable August day. 

Unsent Responce to Family Email Chain.

I’m not sure what the downgrade means to the present or future generations.

I know Japanese 10yr bonds, rated AA- (one notch less than the new U.S. rating) yield something like 240bp less than treasuries.

Some differences of course, not reserve currency, higher savings rate, positive balance of trade, etc.

And I’m not sure how the math works here; lower rated stuff should trade at a higher yield than “risk free.”  But what if the old risk free rate is what is being downgraded?

Do Luxemburg or Liechtenstien or the Isle of Man, each with no military power, less diversified economies, and much greater liquidity risk, carry the new risk-free rate on which we must base all valuations?

Bullshit, says I.

Risk-Free doesn’t exist.  Never did.

US debt is still the reserve currency of the world and the “risk-free” benchmark, regardless of the opinion of a few arithmetically challenged analysts at Standards and Poors  who only a few years ago awarded tranches of 580fico based CDO-cubed the same ratings as US sovereign debt.

Not sure I believe the outrage and panic of CNN.

There probably will be effects, but any dislocations caused by the re-jiggering of instruments whose management’s didn’t see this coming, is opportunity for someone else.

 

(And if it offers any solace, the Canadian stock market climbed 15% after they lost their AAA in 1993; Japan went up 25% when they lost theirs in 1998.)

(Disclosure:  Short U.S. treasuries.)

Hope all are well,

J.

First Political Post

Despite the first post, I’ve mostly stayed away from politics.

But since the debt debacle and market crash, I’ve become increasingly poorer and increasingly angry at the administration.

I voted for the President, mostly out of a sense of optimism and the belief that the pendulum had swung too far right.  I thought the President would be in a unique position to do the hard work of government: To reform entitlements, reduce healthcare costs, reduce crony capitalism, reduce military adventurism, and institute a rebuilding of infrastructure similar to FDR’s new deal.   I was a bit on the fence and worried about an undivided government, but after sitting at a Redskins game, listening to people talk so hopefully of Obama’s election, I chose to ignore my worries and vote for hope.

It turned out to be a bad decision.

Rather than institute decisions to benefit the entire county, the President instead rewarded his supporters with a stimulus package which spent more on unions than roads.

Rather than immediately work on employment measures, the administration’s priority became a healthcare package which did very little to truly reduce costs (means testing, tort reform, insurance shopping, test cost reductions, etc).  It instead increased costs, created impediments to hiring and raised taxes.  The CBO scoring (8 years of revenue versus 4 years of full spending) was ridiculous, and the package further divided the country and increased a call by the public for government austerity.

And though he ran as a “free market guy,” through executive agencies, he increased regulation and compliance barriers for the broader market while continuing to allow loopholes and advantages for supporters.  (Unions, Wall Street.)

Nearly every speech admonished millionaires and billionaires (any household making over 250k) and insisted that they needed to pay “their fair share.”  The speeches ignored the fact that the top bracket would be paying nearly 50% of all income taxes, and nearly 30% of all total taxes.  He cut effective rates on lower income payers though refundable tax cuts, so that more than half of the population paid no income taxes, and nearly 40% of filers paid negative tax rates.

For the first 18 months of the administration, any discussion of economic problems laid the blame entirely on the Bush administration and wall street, and ignored all the damage caused by democratic policies or bad decisions made by the general public.  He took no responsibility for the righting of the ship, and chose to campaign instead.

Speaking is his strength.  The President gives wonderful speeches, and is at his best when he is optimistic.  But like a candidate rather than a president, he has chosen to blame rather than fix.  His policies have been disastrous; the quiet decisions enacted through the agencies are troubling, and his inept lack of leadership is frightening.  He positions himself as the lead opposition to the Republicans rather than chief executive of the entire country.  He is perpetually running for a second term while ignore the duties of his first.

Rather than risk votes by addressing real problems in entitlements, he allowed vicious cuts in real, necessary, social programs.  Rather than face political damage by having to face another debt extension prior to the election, he chose to surrender even more funding to core programs and further hurt job creation.

Philosophically, he naively appears to truly believe that a government can (or should) make things “more fair” and can do so without damaging the overall economy.  He appears to believe that private industry should answer entirely to government, and that “excessive” wealth on the part of individuals is a serious problem for a society.  Worst of all, he believes that citizens must fund the needs of their government, rather than government must exist on what its citizens are willing to pay.

He seems to have forgotten Churchill’s advice that although capitalism unequally shares the benefits, socialism shares the misery.  If history is a guide, “Shared sacrifice,” does not mean eventual equality, it means that your Government will eventually take something from you personally. 

And we have all sacrificed.  What Mr. Obama has taken from us, was the promise of a sense of optimism without blame.   The greatest tragedy was the lost opportunity to remind us we one great country, rather than two flawed parties.  My vote was a mistake I will not repeat.  There was no real Change, and my Hope was misplaced.

Driving Question

The wife and I like to take long drives and engage in meandering conversations which often tend toward the philosophical.  Last time around, she asked what I would do if I could go back and change my life.

I thought about it, and I wouldn’t change much.  My life is good.  I’ve got a great family, good friends, a nice place to live, and I make tolerable money doing something I enjoy.  The health stuff isn’t too bad most days, and I’ve got enough free time to indulge my hobbies and projects.  I've made plenty of mistakes, but I wouldn’t want to risk having things too different then they are now.

If I’d been more serious in my teens and 20’s, I probably would’ve made more money sooner.  But I probably wouldn’t have met my wife, and that would suck.  If I had pursued music more tenaciously, or had tried harder to sell my writing, then likewise no uberwife and probably even more self destructive behavior.

I regret not being a better person, particularly in my teens and 20’s.  I could have gotten where I wanted to go without all the Jack Daniels.  I should’ve been more careful in my relationships, and less selfish. I’ve decided that my life is better when I’m more moderate, when I’m less narcissistic, pretentious, unedited, when I consider my decisions and am less capricious.

At least, that’s how I see things most days these days.

Other days, Fuck that.

I am my excesses.  I am better, truer, more interesting, when I lead an angry, unconsidered life.  Narcissism is the better path for me since --lets face it -- there is a lot to love. And you discover all sorts of shit about yourself after splitting a fifth with a redhead whose name you can’t quite recall.  Besides, being drunk and chasing women was FUN!  Being loud was FUN! Breaking stuff was FUN!  Loudly breaking stuff with unchaste women is FUN FUN FUN!

At least as I recall it.  Truthfully, it’s been quite a while. (15years at least :)

In a more honest assessment of my younger years, most of my adventures sucked either in part or in whole.  For every good story, there are three bad ones.  I wasn’t drinking so much because I was happy.  The chase was more desperation then celebration, and the narcissism wasn’t at all sincere.

So most days, the boy I used to be has very little say in the internal conversation.   

He’s still there to offer his opinion once in a while, but most of the time I’ll tell him to shut up.

This quiet life is better:  My wife is downstairs jogging on the treadmill, singing along to the Bangles (she doesn’t know I can hear).  Our nearly teenage son is still asleep.  I have a busy day planned of watching political TV, reviewing investments and making firewood of a tree that fell deep in the forest.

Maybe I’ll invite the angry me out to help work the chainsaw.

Latvian Beer Story

Few nights back, I met a guy who had married a Latvian woman.  They had lived in the States for several years, and the guy had never met his wife’s family.  When they finally took a trip to the old country, they decided to stay with his wife’s parents so everyone could get to know each other.

The first day, the wife had to run some errands and left the guy with his father in law.  The old man spoke no English, the young man spoke no Latvian.  After watching some t.v. in awkward silence, the old man gestured to the fridge and took out a bottle.  He pointed to the guy, as if to ask if he wanted a beer.  And since the guy didn’t want to offend, he nodded.

The old man poured a tall glass of beer, then took out a jar of creamed herring from the fridge, stirred a dollop into the glass, and handed it to the guy.

Although it didn’t appeal to him, the guy didn’t want to offend.  He choked down the beer and herring mix.  After he finally finished, the old man went to the fridge, took out another beer, cracked a raw egg into it, stirred it up and gave it to the man.

Again, not wanting to offend the local custom, the young man choked down the mixture.

The old man smiled and nodded, then went back to the fridge, took out a beer and mixed in a great number of things:  Pickles, Mustard, spices, etc.

The young man had reached his limit, and finally just shook his head no. The old man offered again, unsuccessfully but then shrugged, laughed, dumped out the beer in the sink and they went back to watching TV.

A while later when his wife returned, the young man relayed the story of his introduction to Latvian culture and cuisine.

“We don’t do shit like that,” His wife told him.  “Dad was just fucking with you.”

Long live the King!

When I was eight or nine, I would visit grandma in Tacoma.  She sometimes called me Gus, which was the name of the cat.  Gus was a sort of nickname and sort of a salutation in teenage Maryland  (Sup Gus).  And Angus became a callsign for various things back when I would waste time on unimportant things instead of wasting time on important things (like being King of a blog.) 

Some years back, after a drink or two and yelling and throwing shoes at Bill Mahr and his court on the TV  I decided I wanted to be King too.  Angus seemed a good and right Kingly name, so I registered my domain, made plans to begin my reign, but went to sleep instead.

And forgot about it. 

Years past.

But last week, I saw King Bill talking again.  He voiced an opinion that voting Republican was akin to acquitting Casey Anthony  -- due to the economic history of the past 15 years.  (Economics aren’t his strong suit.)

Rather than empirically refute the segment point by point, let me instead modestly suggest that it is ass-faced stupidity.  Stupidity so stupid, an unsuspecting viewer may never again have an intelligent thought.  It is as stupid as Songify (which I fucking LOVE!)  It is as stupid as believing it is okay to sleep near anthills after spilling Mountain Dew on your crotch. 

It is so stupid, you will wake up with caffeinated insects gnawing your junk. 

But alas, rationally discussing economic or political dumbshittery on Facebook or emails is dull work and makes you few friends.  It is a shameful habit, best done in the dark (like that peanut butter thing you did as a teenager) so I will keep my thoughts in my own little kingdom.

My apologies in advance.